We are flying to Honolulu today, where I will have several diagnostics. They are moving fast now on my situation. I'm having trouble wanting to do things, not just out of weakness but more in the mode of "Why bother?" The microwave is developing a layer of crud, and I'm indifferent. I'm glad the young man who does yard work for us will be coming today, so at least the exterior of our home will look OK.
I have never liked being ill. It freaks me out to see how a disease could become a career. Everything I'm going through now is designed to enable this. It may not be avoidable.
What I hate most is the intrusion on my body. I am a very "embodied" person. And of course I am also worried about cognitive changes. I certainly am not jumping for joy right now.