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June 08, 2017



A guy sends out this plea, "I'm just looking for a nice woman..."

Where does the title come from?


Brandon: Oh, I forget. Just something I saw on Twitter.
Latest: the Bernieites are mobbing Joan Walsh. Must not have anything better to do.
More: JJ Rowling is getting mobbed, too, by men who call themselves liberals but turn mean when crossed.

Mage Bailey

Am I third generation. My mother and her architectural engineering degree would be two. I the abstract painter three...and I certainly am an old style feminist.

I hope the earthquake didn't bother you too much.

So pleased you are forging ahead no matter the diagnosis. I remember complaining an awful lot when I first had my stroke. Bitchy was me. Now days I try to take things the way you do...thank you for being here. Fun and laughter, however slow, are far, far better than bitchy.


Mage: Your mother and grandmother were extraordinary. They gave you a lot to go on! The earthquake was a minor one. Just one hard shove and a couple minutes of light shaking. In spite of being from Calif. and living here now the strongest quake I've experienced was the one in the 50's in Pacifica. It was only a 5+ quake but very shallow, so it was scary. I was in the middle of an intersection, with the pavement rippling all around me.
Since I'm on palliative, I'm getting all the drugs I need to keep me comfortable, and I can care for my physical needs on my own. That explains at least some of my good mood. Also, I don't have depressive tendencies. My husband is carrying a lot of the emotional load and tends to get blue in his stoical way, so he needs support, too.
I get my new super-comfortable recliner tomorrow!


Some days I despair, especially when I remember my younger self, almost 40 yrs ago marching to reclaim the night, setting up health centers, rape crisis hotlines, all that energy for what?
Or were we just too ignorant?

I am happy to read about your palliative care, it is very comforting.


Sabine: Discussing our situation with a friend, just after the election, I said, "What so many worked so hard for for 40 years means nothing to those people." The turnaround is at hand, but women are being shoved back anyway. Still underpaid, overworked, essential but ignored.


Sorry, are you talking about Bloodlines or another show? I was just going to add before coming to that paragraph that our art certainly renders women second citizens in so many, many ways. Stay strong!


People tend to be a little surprised when I say I'm glad I'm a woman. Guess they don't quite expect that from me.

In the colleges these days, the girls are eating the guys for lunch. Let us in, we'll take over apparently (as too many men feared). Having succeeded at that level, they enter mature relationships, working life, and parenting and go into shock at the limits they encounter. They are stretching the playing field, I think.


Tabor: OOPs. Fixed it.


Jan: My parents were extremely repressive once I reached puberty, and I had to fight my way free. I seldom want to think about my youth, because so much of it was consumed in the struggle to free myself from my parents. That took up most of my energy until I had my daughter. Motherhood meant freedom to me. I could found my own family. I didn't have to see the world their way any more.


Glad your palliative care is being effective. Reflecting on the fifties the limited traditional careers for women were what I heard from school counselor. After college, once in the work force there were certainly limits. Incredible to me that women's progress has been so limited though we've made excursions into so many professions.


With friends like this who needs enemies? He "knew" she'd lose? What is he, clairvoyant? And didn't she win the popular vote?



Brandon: The bros are piling it on. She sure did well for someone so "unpopular," didn't she.


In our household, it's more a case of Jenny relying on me rather than the other way round! Jenny is retired, I'm still working. I do most of the housework, the food shopping, the gardening, paying the bills, organising tradespeople and looking after the cars. Jenny does all the cooking though! Oddly enough, we both find this arrangement satisfactory....


It might not be as bad to be a man as it used to be, in terms of access to inner life and so on. I am impressed with what men in college are like now, in that regard. That is something feminism caused, I think!

Regarding unpaid and unsung work, I may have decided to start wearing it as a badge of pride rather than feel embarrassed about having been pressed into service again, or try to get out of it. It used to be said that nobody is indispensable and that if nobody does it, that means it does not need to be done, and I have come to the conclusion that this last, at least, is not true.

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