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July 07, 2017


Celia Andrews

Just saw pictures from my grandgirl's wedding and I seem to have the same face as yours in many of them. I think wrestling with your health causes the smile to forget to make an appearance. Hugs to you. And your eyebrows do look good.


And being anemic does not help.


That's a contemplative fuzzy mind look I think. Just keep lookin'!


Joared: I hope I'm not turning into a hag on a permanent basis.


Joared: What I wouldn't give to be a fat jolly peasant right now.


The things my Mother taught me as she suffered through 30 years of Rheumatoid arthritis:
1. This disease is the'luck of the draw' or an alignment of the stars, but it is Not Your Fault. (or God's punishment for an imagined wrong or any other such nonsense)
2. As long as you remember to say 'Thank You' and 'I Love you' to the one's that care for you then you are not a burden to them but a real joy in their lives. It is always a privilege to care for those we love. (Allow them that privilege)
3. It is okay to look 'haggard' if you want--just stay away from mirrors.
I am glad Mary is back in your life--she will make you laugh. (She did it for Mother too.)


Toni: I know it's strange, but even in this little corner of the Internet, I thought some honestly would be refreshing. That's me just after a heavy dose of chemo, my fifth round, finally settling into my comfortable chair at home. I feel better, much better this a.m. A neighbor of mine gave up on chemo after three rounds and was dead in weeks. This happened just recently. He could not see the point of living except as a healthy and active person, running his own show. I talked with his widow the other evening. She indicated that they had been living separately, though in the same large house, for years, and, not to blame her, because who knows what others' relationships are about, but one time when we saw him coming back on the plane after a medical treatment, he was by himself. She struck me as abrasive, by no means the nurturing type and quite a contrast to caregivers like Terry and my sister, who is now caring for my brother in law. She has to tell him 10 times a day that she doesn't mind, she is happy to do it.
Factors like depression and poor care giving can cause cancer patients to give up, and that's sad. But I am well looked after. So there I am, in that miserable looking state perfectly willing and eager to go on living!
I'm so happy that Mary's back and wish you could be here, too!
Brandon: The Chemotherapy Survival Guide you gave me is excellent. I had to get to this point to really want to read it, and I think it's very sound. My treatment is quite standard, I see. I picked up some tips, but basically I'm doing more or less what the book recommends. I will review it next week and add some of my own recommendations.


I'm glad you're finding the book helpful. I second what everyone has said here so far. And I hope to visit you sometime soon.


Brandon: Please do. I know how busy you are, and understand. I have loads of reads you can take, too.

Cop Car

You look like a person who is still on the right side of the green, Hattie. That's great!

I used to get really upset with my husband when he told me to "smile". Some of us were born with faces that look sad or angry in repose. You had to work for yours - lol.


Cop Car: Yep. And today I feel quite cheerful! This is the chemo roller coaster I'm on.


Kind of like the unflinching gaze ... sometimes smiles are false. In my case, usually. Glad the roller coaster was on an up when you last wrote.


Hattie, you look right enough to me. Considering the circumstance of your life at the moment. I see a woman with a sharp look and bite.

Mage Bailey

I'm just so glad you are with us Chemo Brain or not. My friend Poolie refuses to blog about her cancer or recovery, and I think we are missing a lot. We are missing her anyway.


Madge: Yes, but she is so much sicker than me. Still, I believe cancer patients should be encouraged to communicate. There is the stigma and a lot of false information out there. I am willing to lay it all out, at least in this modest little publication.


You're right about how the faces of women and men are interpreted differently. A stern-looking woman is seen as bitchy, as you say, while a stern-looking man is seen as shrewd and discerning. Well fuck that, just look any way you want. Especially if you've just had some heavy chemotherapy.

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